Building Mutual Trust
Friendship is a partial sharing of minds. The extent of that sharing depends on the depth to which the friendship goes. Each of a pair of friends constructs a mental model of the other in his or her mind. This model has both intellectual and emotional elements. The process of building and maintaining this model requires an openness of communication in which each friend provides the other with a progressive revelation - an honest inner exposure - of him or herself.
Honest exposure of the inner self to another is not easy. Becoming friends from first meeting to bosom pals requires a progressive growth of mutual trust. But you shouldn’t be naive. Don’t expose your inner being too much too quickly. Like a rock climber, gradually reach out a little further, but only as far as you can afford to fall. At each successful stage, you each hammer in a piton. Then you each risk a further outreach towards the other from your respective points of established trust. Repeat this process until you eventually achieve total mutual trust.
If you fall into quicksand at any stage, grab your rope and haul yourself back to the previous piton (established level of trust). Take this as the appropriate depth for that particular friendship at that particular time. The depth, degree or level of intimacy in friendship is a continuous scale. You have to find the point on that scale that is right for each friendship.
